Am I happy? Yes, but I'm also full of rage.
I was recently asked if I was happy (about having transitioned, making the change, paying the price, etc.). I wonder how many people who knew me before are equally curious? One friend admitted that he prayed for me to fail in my efforts so I would change my mind and go back to living as a man, but that was a while ago. It's been five years since I started to disclose to my family and friends, and I was nearly paralyzed by the fear that my life would be over. I was also afraid for my marriage and hoped it would survive. It didn't. So how to answer the question? The truth is that the answer is not a "yes" nor a "no." It is both. I have never been as at peace in my own skin as I am today, but that does not mean I am happy with life. The loss of friends did not materialize as I had feared, or I should say, it didn't happen the way I feared it would. What happened with old friends is that after their initial expression of love and support for my decision,...